just CALL

So the last few weeks have been tough. Without going into detail, it has become more obvious we need direction, vision and more help here at GSF. Mark is investigating a significant theft and trying to determine who was involved. We have had water pump and generator issues that affect all of us. We have several preteens that are having serious struggles and behavior problems right now and we just don’t know how to address the issue. And, of course, our dear friend, colleague, and teacher, Amanda, in a life threatening condition (see previous posts).

But this blog is not about any of these things but instead of what God has been teaching me through these things. The word is CALL.

“Call unto me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things which you do not know. Jeremiah 33:3 (NASB)

Crying out to God. I think of my own kids and the kids here at GSF. They come and ask for things many times. But it is when they are really desperate and can’t get to me fast enough is when they call to me. Cry out for me. Plead for my help.

Sunday morning, after we had heard how desperate of a situation Amanda was in, I was lying in bed with an unexplained fever.We had just dealt with a behavior in one of our own kids that was very unexpected and all the other situations mentioned above had already happened. I looked at Mark and said, “I am at my lowest!” I felt like I couldn’t even reach God. There was darkness between us. However, I knew that I had to keep calling out to him. Crying to him for all these situations. I read later that day Lamentations 3:55-58

“I called on your name,

O, Lord, out of the lowest pit,

You have heard my voice,

‘Do not hide Your ear from my prayer for relief,

From my cry for help.’

You drew me near when I called on You;

You said, ‘Do not fear!’

O Lord, You have pleaded my soul’s cause.

You have redeemed my life.”

I was at my lowest pit. I felt like everything in me had to cry. But like a child in his bed crying out for his mother in faith, knowing that the mother will hear, I called out to God. And He did hear me and reminded me that He knew each situation and had allowed each situation for my good.

“For I know that plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord. ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. “

But He reminded me . . .

“Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you,’ declares the Lord. . .”

Jeremiah 29:11,12-14a

As this week has continued, He has gently shown me how He is using each situation. Refining me, molding me, teaching me to cry out to Him.

Thursday, when I was first told Amanda was in the hospital and I began to pray, I was reminded that she once said that I was a prayer warrior. To be honest, it was one of those statements that I never understood and I have not been able to let that statement loose. I don’t believe that I am a prayer warrior but, funny thing, it also prodded me to work towards being one. I keep pondering what does it really mean to be a prayer warrior and how can I be that way. I now am struck by the fact that Amanda is the one who said it and it is her sickness that is causing me to seek more and more to be that way. To call out to Him in desperation.

I have always been in awe by the desperation that Hannah prayed. Eli the priest thought she was drunk. Her defense to him was this “I have poured out my soul before the Lord” (1Sam 1:15)

So whatever it is, a need for wisdom and for truth to come out, a desire for a vision, freedom from the bondage of sin, change in my heart, desperate need for healing for a friend or just the strength for the next hour—God will hear and answer as we call out to Him. Some of the answer is just in calling out to Him and through that He changes us and guides us. This is my desire that I will learn to CALL to Him in all things and in that He will change me!

Update on Amanda

Thank you everyone for your prayers for our dear friend! She is steadily improving but has a long way to go. If you would like to keep updated on her progress you can check out her caring bridge page.

Thank you so much for praying for her; it means a lot to us, her and her family and friends.

Crying out for a friend

As many of you know, we have been blessed with a fabulous teacher for our kids here in Uganda. Amanda Kruppenbacher came to Uganda in June of last year to be the teacher for the missionary kids at GSF. She has been so much more. She is our neighbor, friend and co-laborer. She brings so much fun and laughter to GSF. The kids all know her as Auntie Amanda.

Several weeks ago, after finishing the school year, she decided to make a trip to the States to surprise her mom who was getting ready to have surgery. It was also going to be a time for her to relax, refresh and reflect. I got word on Thursday that she had been hospitalized for malaria that she had contracted here before she left. Saturday evening, we got the devastating word that it had progressed to a very dangerous form of malaria called Cerebral malaria. Her malaria parasite count was very high, the brain was swollen, and there were signs of meningitis. They were having to fly in the medicine to PA from Atlanta.

We called all the GSF kids together to pray for their Auntie Amanda. We all gathered together and sang some songs and then divided in groups and began to pray. It was so sweet to see big boys with little boys leading them in prayer for someone they love! These are kids who know pain and know the God who heals.

This morning we woke to find a text on my phone that said all the malaria parasites were gone! That is an incredible miracle. Something that medicine alone couldn't do in less than a day. We have been keeping track all day and have found out that the swelling is continuing to decrease.

God has done amazing things already for Amanda but she is still in ICU and still in need of a lot of prayer. He is not finished and we ask that you continue to pray for healing for Amanda. We are also asking God to use this in the lives of the kids here at GSF.

Our hope is in Him

My eyes are continually toward the LORD, For He will pluck my feet out of the net. Psalm 25:15

We had a fabulous time with Mark's family. His mom, two brothers, David and J.R. and nephew, Gage came for 2 weeks. They stayed at GSF for a week and then we went on safari for the last part of the trip. Best safari we have been on.

Friday morning, we were leaving the lodge to get them to the airport for their flight that evening and got delayed paying the bill (as someone had billed a few things to one of our rooms). We then hurried to the ferry which runs only every hour. We got there just as the ferry was leaving and had to wait another hour! We were bummed and knew our time would be cut short and a little rushed. However, through the rest of the day, everything went smoothly. We even had lunch ready for us when we got to the restaurant and we didn't feel the pressure of rushing to get to the airport on time.

As we were traveling, we got reports of riots in Kampala. Because of the arrest of the top opposition leader the day before, the city and several other areas in the country were in upheaval. We even heard of some of our co-workers who were caught in the riots as they took two of our GSF kids to the doctor. We found out later that God orchestrated our matron and our two missionary nurses to all be in the car with Claudia, one of the other missionaries. If one of our kids would not have gotten hurt the day before, these ladies would have been on the Kampala streets, in the taxi park or in a taxi during these riots, which would have been a more dangerous place to be. God is good.

Meanwhile, we were talking with our driver and our country coordinator on how best to get to the airport (in Entebbe an hour on the other side of Kampala). The driver planned on taking the western by-pass which seemed we would only go through one place where there were riots. We got to that one place and saw that business was back to usual but there were still smoldering logs and tires on the side of the street. As I looked at the smoke I realized that the riots may have stopped only an hour before.

We continued our route and discovered the remains of ash, tear gas canisters and burnt tires all along the way. We quickly realized that if we had not missed the ferry, we may have been right in the midst of the end of the rioting all along the way. God is so good!

We got our family all the way to the airport and said our tearful good-byes but grateful the good things we had experienced together.

We drove back yesterday and all was clear. The unrest seems to be on the week days especially on Monday and Thursdays. We are safe here in the sugar cane fields but request prayer for peace for Uganda. Pray for wisdom for the leaders of Uganda and those in the opposition party.

A horse is a vain hope for deliverance; despite all its great strength it cannot save. But the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine. We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD, even as we put our hope in you. Psalm 33:17-22

Gifts

Walked down to the little cemetery at GSF today. . .

I've been there before but it had been a while.

And in a while . . .

Beautiful Norah with hope in her heart that she would someday see her Savior saw that someday in September.

Charming Emmanuel learned that Jesus could give him a body that would work so perfectly that he would dance before the King and he did just that in early January.

Incredible Gloria who taught me so many things learned in March that God would heal all her wounds and infirmities and make her new.

But I stand here in this little cemetery and cry and thank God for the gifts He gave me in these three precious lives! I also stand here and thank Him for the 80 other precious lives He has given me on the other side of the hill from the cemetery.

SEB

Sebastian, 18 months old, has been in our feeding program. Because he was not getting bigger and because of issues not to be mentioned, the feeding program was not working for little Seb.. Yesterday, I went with our social worker, Keren, and several others to this little guy's home and village to pick him up and bring him into GSF. We discovered at that time that there may be health issues that had never been discovered during the feeding program days. We took him to a doctor today for a thorough check-up. It was discovered he has a bilateral cleft palate.

I looked up bilateral cleft palate on the internet and found this statement, "it is typically diagnosed immediately at birth." This little guy is 18 months old and is not very big because it has been hard for him to suck and food goes back through his nose. It has saddened me that a little guy who could have gotten help has suffered with this for 18 months.

Please pray for little Seb. We will consulting be with the doctor soon and may even have surgery next week.

Lessons learned from Gloria

GSF is full of sweet and great stories of kids whom God obviously has His hand on. One of the sweetest is of Gloria. It has been said that Gloria's mom had measles when she was pregnant with Gloria. Gloria was born with severe cerebral palsy and mental retardation. I have been told that many kids from Gloria's tribe who have deformities "accidentally die" as babies. But Gloria did not die--God had more for her to do! She came to GSF 5 years ago in 2006; she was estimated to be 4 years old at the time. She received much therapy and love. Her story taught me that God values all life!

When I first saw Gloria, I didn't know how to approach her. She would want me to lift her but she was just too big. Finally one day, an ENT came to visit GSF and went to look in Gloria's ears. I sat down to hold her so he could check her. I cradled her in my arms and she immediately snuggled in! I was floored! She just wanted to be cradled. God taught me through Gloria that everyone desires love in one way or another and I should strive to give it. I loved going and holding her and she loved it as well. I grew to love Gloria dearly.

Early last year, Gloria got really sick with Typhoid. How she got typhoid, we will never really know but she became very weak and small. She was in the hospital for a long time but finally got to come home and we all rejoiced. About a month later, chicken pox spread around the orphanage and Gloria got it the worst. It was all over her body and inside as well. Eventually Gloria recovered from chicken pox and we were all relieved. She then began a cycle of being in and out of the hospital due to pneumonia at least 4 times. Several times we thought we were going to lose her. We have sent out blog updates asking for you to pray for her numerous times and you have prayed and God always answered our prayers. Many of you will remember the entry about Lilly going to the hospital and praying for Gloria. God taught me again that God had Gloria's life in His hands and He was a miracle working God.

Through this time of Gloria's illnesses, we had 2 other children die (Norah in September and Emmanuel in January). Both deaths were difficult and very eye opening into the differences of how this culture deals with death compared to the culture I grew up in. Both deaths were in the early morning and it was so difficult waking up to the news and sharing it with others. I began to dread the day that God would call our sweet Gloria home and even asked that He would take her during the day. At the same time, when I would see Gloria suffering, I would ask Him to take away her suffering. I knew she would be so much better off. One evening, Gloria was gasping for air after choking on something. We had to rush her to the hospital. I asked God if this was the end and told Him I was dreading it. Gloria defied death again and came home the very next morning smiling and alert. God gently reminded me that everything was in His timing.

Three weeks later, I was sitting on my veranda and got a "Gloria update" from Sarah, one of the nurses. She seemed okay but did have a fever and was having a difficult time breathing. None of us thought much about it as she had struggled so many times before. About an hour later, Mark walked out of the back room holding my phone and said that Sarah just called and she couldn't find a pulse on Gloria. I stopped . . . what was the scene going to be like when I went to her house. Mark raced on over but I hesitantly put on my shoes and had a chat with God as I walked over to the house. Believe it or not, when I arrived I came upon a very peaceful scene. They had Gloria laying out on a mattress on the back veranda working on her. We had said we wanted to do what we could to try to save her life. So the nurses and others were courageously but so peacefully working to see if she would begin to breath again. Gloria went into the presence of her Heavenly Father March 14, 2011 at approx 8:30 am. A glorious morning--praise Him that it was a beautiful sunny morning! The arrangements were taken care of effortlessly (unlike the other two). We had the memorial service for Gloria at 4:30 that same day. Her uncle and aunt took the body to her grandfather's land many hours away the next day for the burial. In all of this, God taught me that even when He takes one of His loved ones home, He still provides and lovingly cares for those left behind. I so often dread those things that God in His time gives me the grace and peace to deal with.

God is a God of peace! God teaches us even through those whom the world calls the "least of these." He loves and cares for them and wants us to learn to love and care for them. Praise God for Gloria's life!